The media our kids consume affects how they behave.

the media we choose for our children should be selected with care, media can shape how we think and respond to others, and the power of what children see on their screens can either contradict or affirm the standard of behaviour you want in your home, so you need to be aware of the content of the media in your home.

One of the biggest effects on children’s behaviour today is not just the overconsumption of media but WHAT they are consuming.

Never before have our children been so inundated with choice and time when it comes to the media they consume, and the worst part is, many parents are either unwilling or unable to demonstrate and teach their children healthy habits and guidelines when it comes to what is watched and how much is consumed.

Media and the devices used to consume it are easy to buy and use, and parents are allowing young children to choose what and when they watch and play. This leads to not only an addicted child, who will struggle at school and socially, but children begin to act out what they watch.

making rules around media is a healthy family practice

To me and I am sure many other mothers who have strict rules on not only how much media is consumed but what is watched, it is easy to see how children become what they watch, from toddlers speaking in American accents (always odd here in Australia) to bratty four-year-old girls who refuse to get along with a brother because he is a a ‘stupid boy’ this almost always comes from what they have been watching and learning from on the tv.

this post is part of my child training series, and I think is one of the most important ones you can read, if you are a parent who is struggling with how your children act toward you and each other, then looking into what they are watching is a very important step.

More is caught than taught.

haven’t we all heard this phrase, “More is caught than taught!”

when I hear it I immediately begin assessing all my life choices thus far, and come up with at least ten things I should change there and then to be a better role model for my children, since little eyes are always watching me.

But what many of us aren’t aware of is the characters and ideals we are allowing our children to watch and absorb during the screen time slot in our days.

We have to acknowledge that media choice is just as important as time spent watching

We have it harder than our parents did when it comes to media and controlling it.

Yes, we had TV and that came with all sorts of choices.

but now we have smart devices, phones, tablets, and screens in our cars, and all of these have access to online streaming, all with infinite choices for our children.

I want to be the family that doesn’t have a TV in the living room. I know it will be tough even for me, but I am willing to take the hard road for a time, I am not able to make that choice quite yet, as my hubby still enjoys the tv (as much as I do, not going to lie) and he isn’t willing yet to give it up in the living room.

until that day, when we are screen-free, and I no longer have to make rules and regulations I am doing those very things.

create media guidelines based on the RESULTS you want

I am sure you are aware that limiting screen time is a good thing, and that is a relatively easy task if you set rules, and stick to a plan when it comes to rebellion.

what I think is harder is also controlling what your kids are watching or playing when they do have screen time.

trust me, I have dealt many times with the negative impacts of certain tv shows that suddenly turn my once agreeable children into bratty tweens who think parents are stupid, boys are gross and girls should be dressed up and turning their noses up at everything and everyone.

and the shows I let them watch were what I at first thought were ok.

kids will adopt the behaviour they are watching

what I have learned is that these behaviours can be very subtly implied, but children will absorb it, and if you allow it to be watched, it will change the behaviour of your children.

children are sponges, and they are always keenly learning, little ideas are adopted and tried all the time by young children and older alike, and if you allow media that goes against what the behaviour want in your home then you are trying to save a sinking canoe with a holey bucket.

you need to make a set of rules for what they consume, and you need to base it on the behaviour you want in your children.

if you want respect, then you can’t allow shows that disrespect parents.

if you want your children to get along, then you can’t allow shows that promote siblings fighting or putting each other down with unkind words and sour attitudes.

If you want a speech code in your home, then you need to monitor the quality of the conversation and overall message that the TV show, movie or game is promoting.

name-calling, speaking on silly topics, and promoting a low-quality style of conversing is common in children’s entertainment.

here are some if the rules I put in place for media in my home.

  • no tween/teen based tv shows or movies (if I find one with the below rules met I would allow it)
  • no mocking of parents (especially fathers, which is prevalent in children’s media)
  • no blaspheming
  • no twaddle (meaning no shows or games that are just ridiculous in nature)
  • No provocative dressing, (cartoons can be bad for this in children’s media)
  • no witches or magic worshipping of deities
  • no sexually suggestive content
  • No anti-God content (some wildlife documentaries will mention this but this is ok)

when I put these rules in place it severely limits the amount of media my children can choose from, but a lot of things I don’t like can still sneak in, so I am always monitoring what is being watched.

I like to stick to a list of movies and shows my kids can watch here are the ones I can remember!

  • the Wallace and Gromit series
  • Tintin
  • the Gruffalo
  • snail and whale
  • stickman
  • the highway rat
  • the old cinderella
  • Winnie the pooh
  • monsters inc
  • finding nemo
  • finding dory
  • the old Mary Poppins
  • the original Peter Rabbit series
  • the old Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie
  • the cartoon Grinch movie
  • flushed away
  • chicken run
  • Stuart little series
  • Little House on the Prarie series
  • Shaun the sheep
  • ratatouille
  • the good dinosaur
  • up
  • Luca
  • Walle
  • bolt
  • cars 1-3
  • the sound of music
  • shipwrecked on Treasure Island

movies for older children, 12 and over.

this is at your own discretion, we all have different opinions on what we think is acceptable for our children to watch

my rules for these movies are the same as above, but I allow some wriggle room.

we like the Johnny English movies, the old Superman movies, the first Star Wars (4-6) movies. (minus the gold bikini scene) We watch some Topgear specials, Mythbusters, and things that contain the odd swear word and sexual innuendo (still very mild in nature)

take control of the devices in your home.

I mentioned wanting to eventually remove the t from our living room, I long for this because I want the end result, I want the children who are better at being bored, who can find a book great entertainment, or drawing, painting or creating with blocks.

I find that screen time takes away from a child’s ability to think up worlds and scenes since it’s easier to simply watch them ready-made on TV.

however, until that day, I do everything I can to limit access to screens in our home.

no screens in my hands, no using my phone or tablet for entertainment, (sitting all day in a hospital waiting room has been the exception.)

there is no internet access and I cannot see the screen, so my older children use my computer which is in the main living area of our home. and you can use website blockers by keyword to be sure that you can block some sites and ads.

Bark Us– is a great blocker for your browsers on computers, phones and tablets.

but you can just Google website blockers to find many free and paid sites that let you choose what sites and what kind of content is available to view on your browser.

Be ready for the backlash

At last, I want to mention what you can expect as a parent if you are looking to make changes to your screen time routine.

time is a big deal, reducing it, or removing screens altogether is tough on kids and adults alike.

you do need to think of them as addicted to a substance, as their brain (and yours) is wired that way, it can be hard for the chemical receptors in your brain to know the difference between excess screens and meth.

You can have some understanding, and give your kids things to do, but don’t think that you have to now replace the screen time they had with YOU.

this can be why in the first place parents use TV as a crutch, a way to silence the kid to get some peace (I am very guilty of this) but we need to acknowledge that by doing this you are making your life harder overall.

kids need to be able to play alone, (or with each other) without tearing down the house and without needing your attention. Think of it as a life skill.

when it comes to switching up what your kids watch, keep it simple.

you can try making a list and putting it up somewhere, and that is what they can choose from.

the rule is, if they think the show or movie is too boring, then there must be something else that is much more interesting!

If you want to learn more about child training which can help you achieve less screen time in your home, join the email series!


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